How To Deal With People Who Are Draining Your Energy?

Are there people in your life who constantly drain your energy? If so, you establish an energetic connection with these people, through which your physical, mental and emotional energies are drained.

These type of connections are called compassionate connection. The first time you establish them is from a sense of compassion you have for the other person. Unfortunately, over time this connection is not longer appropriate.

Most people have these type of connection, especially empaths. Those working in the healing arts, have the highest number of these types of connections.

Have you ever had the experience that when a certain person calls or comes to visit, you feel drained? If so, you are giving your energy to this person without realizing it.

You do so by allowing them to tell you all their problems and manipulate the conversation and ultimately the relationship. You know when this happens because the following always happens:

  • They only want to talk about their problems and are clearly uninterested about yours.
  • If you attempt to talk about your problems, you get the feeling that they really don’t care.
  • They don’t pay much attention to what you say; they just want you to agree with them.
  • When they talk about their problems it’s always to complain or criticise others.
  • If they ask for a favour they expect you to say yes. If you say no, they make you feel guilty or create a lot of drama and you feel obliged to give in.
  • If they call you and you are not there, they leave many messages.
  • They don’t tell you the truth about things. They tell you only what they think is important so that you give them you sympathy and understanding.
  • They refuse to see how they created a certain situation, but prefer to see themselves as victims.

These people may be in your life right now. They can be co-workers, family members or close friends. They take your energy. They do so because they are not willing to take responsibility for their own thoughts, emotions and actions.

Because these people are close to you, it is very hard for you to see what’s happening to you energetically. The reason why you give them your energy is because it makes you feel good to be able to help them.

Nonetheless, when you listen to them complaining, when you feel sorry for them, when you take on their responsibility, when you want to help them, you create these energetic connections, which consequently drain your vital force energy.

You take on their negative energy, negative emotions, and negative mental patterns by taking on their problems. They always feel better and you always feel worn out.

Creating Energetic Blocks

These compassionate connections are not simply formed by giving a helping hand to a friend, or helping a loved one accomplish a task once in a while. These connections are upheld by you constantly feeling sorry, responsible and worried about these people.

There is a part of you that becomes too connected with these people’s problems and you become unable to detach yourself from them. And believe me; they are very good at making you feel part of their problem to the point that you feel the need to help them.

Most people create these compassionate connections by absorbing their negative emotions, but are unaware to what extent they do it, they do so because they feel they have no choice.

It's important to energetically clear these types of connections because this behavior is inappropriate and creates energy restrictions at the level of our emotional well-being. An energy restriction is when you allow an external event to create negativity within you, which ultimately leads to you to disconnect from divine source. By negativity, I don’t mean bad or evil, I mean that you “negate” attending to your own needs. 

You are here to allow the expression of you own Divine self and experience life through your divine gifts and your soul purpose.

If you take on the responsibility of others through these compassionate connections and you decide to give them your energy, you are not following your life purpose and you are not allowing them to do the same.

This behavior is inappropriate because by taking on their lesson, you are not allowing them to learn what they are here to learn or experience, and you avoid doing what you are here to do because you are busy helping them.

The truth is, you need to look at the people in your life as powerful capable souls that can indeed take care of their own problems and can turn things around.

This is easier said than done when it comes to loved ones. But this is how it works according to the law of karma. If you do not follow this principle, you end up creating more karmic ties for yourself.

Your role is that of a guide to show them by example and to help them through encouragement and coaching. When you help them do what they are very capable of doing on their own, you empower them and you empower yourself.

The Energetic Dump

The energetic dump happens when you take on the negative energy of others unknowingly. When you go along with their negative thinking processes, you get the energetic dump of their negativity. It is important for you to become very aware of your relationships and to whom you give your energy.

I invite you to look at your life and identify the people you are giving energy to. You will realize how much drama they create every time they want your help, attention, time, money or any other form of support. 

You feel as if you have no choice, but to help them. This is usually because you have very poor boundaries and they know it.

Poor boundaries are created when you allow others to take advance of your good nature by letting them to walk all over you. Poor boundaries are learnt at a very early age and sustained due to lack of self esteem.

Empaths are especially prone to this type of experiences early on in their life. If not detected and corrected, they can remain into adulthood and cause a great deal of stress and anxiety,

When you are an empath you are a great energy transmuter. You can easily take on others mental and emotional emanations. But you can also shift energy around in your environment, in yourself and on others. You become and energetic dump and cleaner all at the same time.

People sense this ability and take advantage of you because you allow it. You do their energetic clearing on their behalf. Of course this happens on an unconscious level. You often give into this situation because you desperately want to:

  1. Keep them in your life at all costs
  2. Are afraid of their drama spells
  3. Think you have no choice but put up with them
  4. Don't know how to say "no"

The Heart-Wall

Empaths tend to attract situations that exploit their empathic abilities and take advantage of their positive loving giving energy. They become an energy dump for everybody in their environment. Over time in order to protect themselves from further harm, the subconscious mind creates an invisible Heart-Wall made of negative trapped emotions absorbed in this way.

If this happens, it is never by mistake, but always by vibrational choice. Most empaths have early childhood experiences in which they take care of others emotionally, mentally or physically to learn how to use their spiritual gifts.

I also believe that empaths are incarnating in large numbers at this time of human transformation and their role is to transmute negative energy into positive. They are like energy cleaners walking around to bring more light to humanity.

The risk is that they become overwhelmed with too much negative emotions. The untrained empath will most likely have a Heart-Wall of protective negative energies and feels like the world is an unsafe place. Clearing the Heart-Wall is the first step in releasing the negativity that has affected them over the years.

The Energy Drain

The energy drain happens when you take on more than you fare share of negativity. By becoming a psychic sponge of negative emotions, you become overwhelmed. You retain the negative thoughts and emotions and they become part of you.

When you have the ability to transmute negative energy into positive energy, you have a gift. This is who you are at soul level and this is what you do best.

Unfortunately, our society does not recognize these gifts and nobody teaches an empathic or highly sensitive child how to manage their energy, understand their gifts and become proficient in energy management.

Most empathic children grow up into adulthood feeling different, used and unsafe. If you are an empathic soul and feel that the information in this article is helping you better understand yourself, know that you have the ability to change things around in your relationships and create new ways to relate to people.

Your job as an empath is to find balance between tending to your needs and serve others through your gifts. It’s important to know that when to say “no” to others, you say “yes” to yourself!

This is the learning of every empathic soul!

When you say “yes” to yourself, you are actually sending out a vibratory message to the universe that comes back to you as abundance, support and healing.

This is the only and best way for you to help others. No need to give out your personal energy and no need to feel drained and unappreciated in order to have friends or people in your life.

You Are a Vibration Match To Your Expereince

The Universe Always Matches Your Vibrational Messages!

This is the most important spiritual technique you can use in order to keep your energy intact and stay on your soul’s path.

If you feel tired or low in energy, stressed and anxious, chances are that you have unconsciously allowed somebody to use your energy. The best way to know this, is to go over you daily interactions each night before bed and mentally revisit what you have done, who you have talked to and soon you will know and feel who or what situation was the culprit who took your energy.

In your mind revisit the interaction and search for what energy frequency is allowing you to behave that way. Was it guilt, shame, blame, responsibility, obligation, fear, insecurity, or other?

Make sure you identify this frequency and then let it go. If you do not remove it from your energy field, it will continue to vibrate and resonate with similar situations.

This allows you to attract over and over the same type of situation based on this frequency. This can go on for years and even lifetimes.

Use affirmations to help you.

Many Blessings!

 Angel Messages and Inspirations  


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